Sunday, August 31, 2008

Lighting Fixture Of Death


Something is definitely amiss here at World Of Poot Headquaters. First there was the Windowsill Of Death incident and now...

During a routine piece of maintenance in the South Wing drawing room, our resident electrician - Bob Spark - was horrified to discover yet more terrifying scenes of insect demise.

When interviewed by the local Death Squad, headed up by Chief Inspector Detective Hammer Von Clark, Mr. Spark said "Oh, it was awful. Just awful. I mean, I've seen a few sights in my time. All it needs is those extra 20 watts of energy and... well... you just wouldn't want to be in their shoes. Err... hang on - do insects wear shoes?"

If you are of a nervous disposition, or just don't like the thought of chargrilled bug, you might like to look away now.

Oh, the humanity!

Friday, August 29, 2008

The Return Of The Vandal!


Just as things were starting to quieten down on the Babbington/vandal/wall artist front, lo and behold! I stumbled on this new one in the town of Swimp. It was still fairly wet, so our imposter couldn't have gone too far.

I feel the net may be closing in - who knows, the true identity of this so called 'Babbington' may be revealed very soon... ;)

In case you can't make out what out phantom scribbler has said, it's ''Babbington Is Back!''

Bat Poot - original artwork

Following the recent success of
action blockbusters The Black Knight and Bat-Nev, much has been made about the relative merits of the chosen cast members. Clearly, it was important that the actors be at the top of their game... but everyone needs inspiration.

We are proud to announce that, for the princely sum of £3.72 and a bunch of 'Computers For Schools' vouchers, World Of Poot has successfully obtained one of the original sketches on which the lead character was based.

This is truely art, my friends - by any definition. Enjoy!

Thursday, August 28, 2008

50th Post!


Well I never, World Of Poot is now 50 poots long!
(And to think they said it'd never last!)

If you have only just found us - where the hell have you been?!

Some of our particular favourites thus far inlcude:

Barry's Book Corner
Kevin Ketley
Neville Cheestring
Pompoms In Space
Random Objects
Windowsill Of Death
WOP Hotel
WOP International

Many thanks to all for your most gracious support and donations.

We're off to crack open the Babysham and KP nuts now. I personally can't wait to see Nev get up on the Karaoke. After his triumphant performance at this year's Folding For Fanatics seminar after-party in Croydon, we're sure to be in for a treat. So brace yourself Mitch - looks like it's gonna be one helluva party!

Here's the future of mindless 'entertainment'!

Random Objects: #4 - Dead Meat

Funny what you find at the end of the garden, isn't it?

This poor critter appears to be feeling a little deflated, a mere
trace of its former self:

But just what do we have here? Is it a bird? Is it a plane?
No, clearly not.
I'm not an expert, and I have not yet performed an autopsy,
but I'm guessing this is an ex-puddy tat.

Closer inspection may lead our keen roadkill enthusiasts to confirm this status:

Poor old Tiddles! Still, it's what he would have wanted.

(Disclaimer: No animals were harmed in the gathering
of our research; this one was already a gonner!)

Saturday, August 23, 2008

The Most Pointless Video...Returns!

Once again, and after much demand from hundreds of people (far too many to list here, and indeed - publish all their comments, naturally), The Most Pointless Video returns....
It's bigger, bolder...and even more ridiculous.

Friday, August 22, 2008

The Things You Find! (Random Objects: #3)

Okay, so this morning I went on a ramble in the countryside (it's okay Neville, I remembered to pack my anorak), and as well as seeing some lovely nature, it was this that really caught my eye!

In the middle of a field, obviously planted by some music fan as a CD seed, now grows a CD plant. Worth it? Possibly....

Perhaps when I return to the site - if I so wish - it might have cultivated into a DVD rack or possibly an entire volume of Bob Dylan discs.....

It's a real pity that this disc wasn't playable. I'd like to have known what 'foo' was.....

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

WOP News - Fame Update

A quick update from the WOP News Room... Our little slice of madness is gathering pace!

Hey, we've even had some genuine comments... from actual real people... you know, with legs and things!

Even after just 40-summat posts, we are now well and truely lodged within the deepest, darkest recesses of the Google listings - actually within the first couple of pages:

But what we are especially proud of is the fact that even the listing itself is... well... random in its makeup. Marvellous!

Thought For The Day - Potslug

Today's thought was inspired by this shocking discovery in the kitchen:

Just how do slugs get into potatoes?

This slug was dead before I 'accidentally'
cooked it in the microwave. Probably.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

More From Norman Cheestring!

Here he is - grandfather of our Neville in full technicolour glory and that...
Neville passed to us some vintage footage of the time when Norman's hair was still dark brown yet his facial hair had turned white! This is a rare condition called Haventgotawhitewigis. For more information on this terrible condition, go to your nearest chemist.
Take it away Norm!

Credits: Music 'Steptoe and Son' theme by Ron Grainer.

Most Pointless Video...ever!

Let's get back to basics here - enough of the fancy, professional videos that you've become accustomed to here on WOP. This is the first in what could possibly be a very long and aimless series of banal and dull movies.
So here we go.....Video #1; Woman gets on bus!

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Babbington Strikes Again!

This is quite extraordinary. I think we've established the the vandal from the last post is not the same Babbington, the other half of the WOP team. However, there does seem to be a blight of these tags all over the country. Once again, on my travels, I've encountered several, here are a few.....

Phone box on a council estate in Greeb.

'Shared Messages' on a shop front in Thwick High Street.

How did he get up there?? This railway bridge in Muckler's Common illustratrates that this Babbington is quite an acrobat!

We must get to the bottom of this, to find out the true identity of this other Babbington. This imposter of the name 'Babbington' must be exposed! Keep 'em peeled folks.

Friday, August 15, 2008

Babbington - The Vandal!


It appears that on my travels this week - I stumbled upon this tagged wall in the village of Nutty. Far be it for me to presume that our very own Babbington was responsible for this - unless there is another Babbington out there. It's best not to think too much about that.....;)

Well, I don't know. Dreadful behaviour....

Sunday, August 10, 2008

Barenaked Fun

Music is good.
We like music.
We like Barenaked Ladies.

(Please be patient - this sucker might take a
bit longer to load up. Well worth it though!)

Friday, August 8, 2008

Barry's Book Corner

This month, Barry Baitumen has been in a very philosophical frame of mind. Unsure of his roots, where he came from - and indeed where he is going - he has been in heavily contemplative mood, reaching deep into himself as well as the Book Corner library.

His pick of the bunch this time around is "Darwin" by Adrian Desmond & James Moore - which is suitably located outdoors, surrounded by nature (in the form of the WOP veggie patch):

Barry was 'unavailable for comment' when we tried to press him for a few words. All he could say as he fled across the car park was "Why?! Why?! I just don't know what to make of it all!".

Wise words indeed, Barry - and we look forward to your next glowing recommendation.

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Nevilla Cheestring - Sister Of Norman!

Well, it seems that the family tree of our Norman Cheestring goes a little further back than we first thought. Here is an album cover of 'Top Of The Pops 1976' with Nevilla, the sister of Norman. As you'll see, she was quite a stunner and the family resembalance is startling.

She was never again seen on records covers, Nevilla lead a very quiet life after that, working in a biscuit farm near Thatch.

She recently said 'I was proud to have done my bit of stardom, but my true life in biscuit-wifery was always calling. I don't miss the late nights and the wild parties, because I was never invited to them'.

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Present Yourself!

I have sat through many presentations in my time.
None tickled me quite as much as this one.


Thought For The Day - Albinochook


What colour are the eggs laid by albino chickens?

Disclaimer: The above is not an albino chicken
(or, at least, not to the best of our knowledge)

Friday, August 1, 2008

Film Corner With Barry Pokevest...

Bat-Nev 12a

With Barry Pokevest

Ah yes, it's Barry here! I've been asked to do a review of this summer's blockbuster 'Bat-Nev'. And boy what a film this was..if you haven't seen it yet at your local cinema, then I assume you just don't want to.

This film has put the 'Bat' into 'battering ram' which is what the film does to your senses from the first moment our hero gets into the new vamped up Batmobile.

The new Batmobile

It's a case of Holy Something or another in this extravaganza. I've been told not to give too much of the plot away, so this will be relatively spoiler free.....

Bat-Nev/ Bruce Wang, played by Neville Cheestring is called in by Commissioner Bennett to investigate a string of robberies in Temple Meads. The only clues - a mysterious riddle, a joke and a penguin bar.

Neville Cheesetring plays the caped hero of Temple Meads

Leading the double life as a millionaire train spotter, Wang has to dig deep into the criminal underworld to seek out who's responsible whilst fighting off love interest from the delecatable Ethel Spriggett.

There is a scene where Bat-Nev jumps onto a subway train and somehow collects the number, before breaking into the train and kicking The Joker senseless.

Oops, shouldn't have told you that.

The jaw dropping finale set in space was a huge gamble, but it paid off, and you'd never see that one coming! Again, perhaps I should have not mentioned that bit.

I'd best go before I ruin it for all.

Barry's Verdict: A dark, brooding action film, with rolling stock. 9/10

Batman Logo: Warner Bros Pictures, Batman created by Bob Kane.

The Windowsill Of Death

Somewhere, out there, in a land far, far away (actually, it's just at the bottom of the East Wing staircase) lies a battlefield strewn with the debris of Mother Nature's battles.

Amidst this barren landscape can be found the titans of insect aviation and the sedate languishers of our precious scenery.

It is a cold, heartless world; a place of desolation and despair (well, for the insects at least), where only the most nimble of vacuum cleaners dares go on its clean-up mission.

This is the Windowsill Of Death.

More donations

Regular (and I use that term very loosly) readers will recall my delight at receiving a cheque from our very own Neville Cheestring recently - as noted here.

Well, would you believe it, I received another cheque today - this time from WOP's No.1 (and, frankly, only) sports pundid, Kevin Ketley:

Am I once again delighted? Sadly, no.

My initial elation was shortlived when, on closer inspection, I discovered that Mr. Ketley 'forgot' to sign his cheque. The swine.

An innocent mistake? Pah! This is not the first time he's pulled such a stunt. On one occasion, back in mid 2007, having boasted of a win at the annual Pavement Crack Avoidance Agility Contest up at Dangle Yerbitsthen in Yorkshire, he 'donated' 43,000 pesetas to help start the ball rolling for the WOP International Hotel renovation.


Something is starting to smell decidedly fishy around here - but then, that's probably just Mitch.